Curves are back. The bottom implant is catching up with the good old-fashioned breast implant, celebrities are flaunting perky rears in pencil skirts and even the perennially emaciated Mrs Beckham has been banging on about putting on a few bottom-friendly kilos — albeit comparable to the weight of a packet of crisps.
Working out will hone and tone your rear but let's face it, sometimes we want results right here, right now. Enter the Double-O thong. Every fitness wannabe's alternative to Fitness First. Health tried and tested out the monstrously unattractive contraptions to see if you really can't judge a book by its cover.
The claim
The Double-O thong proudly claims to lift your rear without actually making it bigger. Think nubile Latino as apposed to one Tim Tam off a frumpy housewife. In the shape of a pair of cycling shorts complete with two large holes (hence the double "O" — alas, it's nothing to do with James Bond's smooth persona) that each buttock pops through and is supported by the special "butt booster bands".
The test run
There are a number of logistical issues with these frisky-granny pants, namely, where to step into them. With two holes for the bum, two for legs and one for waist, you definitely don't want to put them on in a hurry. Secondly, given the exceptionally high waist, the chances of it breaking out to public view is a real worry. And finally, the longer thigh-controlling versions cut summer mini-dresses out of the equation.
Logistics aside, once in place the pants are remarkably comfortable. They're soft, despite their chastity-belt facade. And despite panic-attacks the effect would be a combo of VPL and double-bum (much like the double-boob effect of an ill-fitting bra), the material is undetectable under soft denim. In terms of silhouette, "perky" is a term that has until now eluded an adequate visual definition.
Aesthetics
Sadly, these could dampen the spirits of Michael Douglas at his most rampant sex-addict phase. They make Bridget Jones' granny pants seem like a delicate thong in comparison. Looks aside, we cannot deny the results are actually pleasing. Just a few words of advice: go nowhere near a mirror before you put something on over the top and if you are thinking of getting friendly with anyone while wearing them, don't.
Rating
7/10 for results. Depending on your frame, these can provide real butt-boosting results and a great short-term fix between those gym sessions.
-10/10 for looks. For obvious reasons.
To order yourself a pair or find out more, visit
www.lovemybubbles.com.
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