Curves are back. The bottom implant is catching up with the good old-fashioned breast implant, celebrities are flaunting perky rears in pencil skirts and even the perennially emaciated Mrs Beckham has been banging on about putting on a few bottom-friendly kilos albeit comparable to the weight of a packet of crisps.
Working out will hone and tone your rear but let's face it, sometimes we want results right here, right now. Enter the Double-O thong. Every fitness wannabe's alternative to Fitness First. Health tried and tested out the monstrously unattractive contraptions to see if you really can't judge a book by its cover.
The Double-O thong proudly claims to lift your rear without actually making it bigger. Think nubile Latino as apposed to one Tim Tam off a frumpy housewife. In the shape of a pair of cycling shorts complete with two large holes (hence the double "O" alas, it's nothing to do with James Bond's smooth persona) that each buttock pops through and is supported by the special "butt booster bands".
The test run
There are a number of logistical issues with these frisky-granny pants, namely, where to step into them. With two holes for the bum, two for legs and one for waist, you definitely don't want to put them on in a hurry. Secondly, given the exceptionally high waist, the chances of it breaking out to public view is a real worry. And finally, the longer thigh-controlling versions cut summer mini-dresses out of the equation.
Logistics aside, once in place the pants are remarkably comfortable. They're soft, despite their chastity-belt facade. And despite panic-attacks the effect would be a combo of VPL and double-bum (much like the double-boob effect of an ill-fitting bra), the material is undetectable under soft denim. In terms of silhouette, "perky" is a term that has until now eluded an adequate visual definition.
Sadly, these could dampen the spirits of Michael Douglas at his most rampant sex-addict phase. They make Bridget Jones' granny pants seem like a delicate thong in comparison. Looks aside, we cannot deny the results are actually pleasing. Just a few words of advice: go nowhere near a mirror before you put something on over the top and if you are thinking of getting friendly with anyone while wearing them, don't.
7/10 for results. Depending on your frame, these can provide real butt-boosting results and a great short-term fix between those gym sessions.
-10/10 for looks. For obvious reasons.
To order yourself a pair or find out more, visit www.lovemybubbles.com.