Question:

My girlfriend seems to only want to take what I am willing to give to her but when it's all over she feels tired or not "turned on" to return the favour. I start to feel insecure about myself as I think there is something wrong with me for her not to return the favour but she believes that it's ok for her to leave me to do it?

Response:

It sounds as though this is really important for you. Have you been able to talk about this when both of you are not intending to be intimate.

Is there a time, like 10 minutes after she has finished when she would be happy to be part of your finishing?

There are many positives people get from being intimate with their partner; feeling loved, attractive, wanted and close just to name a few. It would be a good idea to work out what are the positive you get when your partner sexually stays the distance with you, the psychological benefits you get when you and your partner finish around the same time together. Once you know these then it would be good to let your partner know what you are missing out on. This might allow both of you to develop ways to sexually care for each other. It is not uncommon for some people to feel sexually turned off once they have orgasms, so what your partner is experiencing may be normal but it is the impact on you and the relationship that needs to be discussed.

For more information please visit the Impotence Australia website.